April 29, 2008

"Beyond the Textbook" Excerpt

Hey everyone!

Hope that your school year is finishing up nicely with lots of wonderful plans for the summer! As you may have noticed in the our latest newsletter, I had an article published in Seasons magazine last month. Thought I'd give you all an idea of what it included. If you'd like to read the article in its entirety, you can check out the Seasons website at www.ripe4harvest.com for their subscription information.

Many blessings,

Beth

Excerpt from Beyond the Textbook:

Some parents are intimidated by planning a unit study because they worry about getting it right or coming up with ideas.  Literature offers some natural leads for planning a unit study because so much of the material is built right into the book.  Using literature as the basis for your unit study also provides immediate structure.  It leads to not only the study of the content, but also to the elements of literature (plot, setting, characters, etc.), learning about the author, analyzing the theme(s), researching the time period of the setting or the when the book was written, vocabulary and more.  Literature is also an easy segue to oral presentations and narrations.

Shakespeare, often studied with older students, naturally lends to unit studies.  Although it is wise to be selective about the work you choose by this profound author as some of the mature themes should not be studied too early, one work that has much to offer is The Merchant of Venice. With any literature based unit study, you can develop components to be completed before, during and after the actual reading.  Some ideas that work well to do before reading include: 

·        Study the time period of Shakespeare (late 1500s – early 1600s, Elizabethan England)

·        Discuss anti-Semitism during Shakespeare’s time (could expand to examine other historical periods that reflect anti-Semitism),

·        Geography lesson about Venice (a financial capital during Elizabethan times),

·        Define “irony” in preparation for finding examples of it in the play as it is read

·        How to read a Shakespearean play for greater understanding (read it like poetry, to the punctuation symbol, not to the end of the sentence). 

 

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March 20, 2008

Growing Moms

Our kids, as well as others, are drawn to a faith that is fresh and alive. In the midst of home schooling, laundry, diapers, housekeeping, ministry, etc., sometimes what we choose to omit from our schedules is regular, daily time with our Lord, to study and meditate on His word, and to pray. As my pastor often reminds his congregation, “We are leaky buckets,” needing to be filled and refilled on a daily basis. And without that daily filling, our faith becomes dry and stale. But how do I fit that in when I’m up half the night with a colicky baby or sick child? I remember a “mom in the Lord” telling me when I asked her that question that sometimes prayer and Bible time are even more important than sleep!
 
When I ruminate upon how busy I think I am, I am reminded of Susanna Wesley. A wife at age 19 and the mother of John and Charles Wesley, Susanna gave birth to nineteen children in about as many years. It is said that she devoted her first hour upon waking to bible study, prayer and hymn singing. She inspired, discipled, mentored and instructed her children, who knew that when she was sitting with an apron over her head, it meant she was praying and they’d better not bother her. In addition to raising her ten children who lived to adulthood, she dealt with an often absent husband, constant financial burdens, having her house burn down twice, and two sets of twins! Wow. I guess most of us can sandwich in a little time for Bible study! 
 
Although with certainty, study of God’s word has to come first, there have been many other books that have proven to be helpful, encouraging, and often convicting, as well. (See some of my favorites below.)  

We all know it is a lot of work to homeschool, run a household, serve at church and sometimes even work inside/outside the home. But we must take the time, on a daily basis, to renew our faith and grow as believers. As my daughter says, we always think that if we worked a little bit smarter, harder or faster, we would have more time for our personal study, but it really is a matter of making it the first priority. If Susanna Wesley could talk with us today, I’m sure she would agree!

In Grace Alone,

Dana 


Written by a Carmelite lay-brother over 300 years ago who took the name of Brother Lawrence, this inspiring book touched me because he was such a wonderful example of a humble, joyful servant.  These comments are from the publisher:  As a humble cook, Brother Lawrence learned an important lesson through each daily chore:  The time he spent in communion with the Lord should be the same, whether he was bustling around in the kitchen, with several people asking questions at the same time–or on his knees in prayer.  He learned to cultivate the deep presence of God so thoroughly in his own heart that he was able to joyfully exclaim, "I am doing now what I will do for all eternity.  I am blessing God, praising Him, adoring Him, and loving Him with all my heart."

The Practice of the Presence of God

The Practice of the Presence of God.jpg

 

This is an excellent 12 week study about personal and corporate revival, designed to be used in small group study.  From Amazon: Get ready to experience the freedom and joy of an honest and humble heart, true repentance, God's amazing grace, genuine holiness, a clear conscience, radical forgiveness, sexual purity, and walking in the Spirit. Each week includes five days of individual study, questions for group discussion and interaction, testimonies of changed lives, and 'Making it Personal' questions and exercises.

Seeking Him: Experiencing the Joy of Personal Revival

 Seeking Him.jpg

 

This is another VERY REVEALING  study appropriate for a small group.  I liken this study to peeling an onion, slowly, layer by layer. (Warning: You are the onion!)  This is the first of a series of three called "Revive our Hearts."  This first one was fantastic–I will let you know when I have finished the other two. From Amazon:  Every great movement of God is preceded by a season of humility and repentance and a time of tearing down walls, of getting honest with God and others about your true spiritual condition.It may be hard. It may hurt. But in the end, God will use your brokenness to restore your 'first love' for Jesus, rekindle your spiritual fire, reconcile your relationships, and repair your life.A richer, deeper, more God-filled life is waiting for you. And it all begins with Brokenness.

 Brokenness: The Heart God Revives (Revive Our Hearts)

Brokenness.jpg

 

I recently worked through this insightful 'primer' of the reformed faith  with a dear friend.  Jerry Bridges does an excellent job of clearly explaining our foundational beliefs in understandable language.  From Amazon: Why do so many believers live in quiet desperation? The gospel of Jesus Christ is the most explosive news of freedom the world has ever heard. Yet, why do so many of His followers experience so little of the gospel's liberating power? Regrets over our past haunt us, fear and anxiety clutch at us, subtle legalism oppresses us, outright sin entangles us, and we spend much of the day without even thinking of God. Jerry Bridges maintains that the poverty of actual Christian experience is the result of an impoverished understanding of the depths of the gospel itself. The key is not to try a little harder, but to know more fully the incredible work of Christ on the cross-and to live in a more vital awareness of that grace day by day. Bridges does not flinch from the hard facts of human sin and God's wrath-not exactly popular concepts today. But understanding them is absolutely crucial. For without a knowledge of the depth of our sin, we cannot experience "the unsearchable riches of Christ" that are available to us in the gospel. And when we know those riches, we are empowered to live every day "glorying in a sense of acceptance and the experience of grace." The gospel is not just for the afterlife, but for today-it is the gospel for real life. 

The Gospel for Real Life (with Study Guide)

The Gospel for Real Life.jpg

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March 12, 2008

Choosing and Using Outside Teaching Sources Wisely

As a home school mom and teacher of home schoolers, I often wonder where we draw the line when it comes to actually home schooling. It seems that some families farm out their children for most subjects and athletics as well. Then there are other families who don't use any outside resources. I guess this brings me to a question of how we define home schooling. For each family, I would imagine that there's a different definition to some extent. For the first family described, home schooling might be defined generally as parents having full control over their children's academic life without the parent doing the actual teaching. For other families, the idea that home schooling requires that the parents act as teachers may seem essential. I have even known families who have home schooled using nannies. Different states have different definitions of home schooling. I believe HSLDA requires members to be responsible for teaching their children at least 51% of the time. Does that mean that only those of us who do so are really home schooling our children? I wouldn't make that judgment call for anyone. I do think that using outside resources can be very beneficial if you are wise about your choices and feel that there are strong reasons for doing so..

There are any number of reasons that families outsource certain classes for their children, at various ages, including the following:

  1. The parent doesn't feel capable of teaching the course. This is definitely a solid reason for using outside courses. However, be cautious about being too desperate and make sure that the class you choose for your child also meets the needs of your family's value system and quality of education. 
  2. The student desires to take an outside course. Often, by high school, home school students would like a little time away from home. Taking an outside course can offer an opportunity for growth, making the student responsible to another adult, which is a great learning experience. As well, outside courses often also offer a chance to socialize within a structured classroom environment.
  3. The instructor of the course is someone  with whom you'd like your child to spend time. I once put Ally in a middle school current events course just because the professor had such a Biblical, eternal worldview and he was a person for whom I have tremendous respect. She learned to examine happenings around the world from a Christian worldview and loved doing it. I think that having other teachers who demonstrate a love for the Lord or a strong faith can be worth more than the actual course content. As well, teachers who are great encouragers can work wonders for a timid child. For some children, they hear encouragement from mom and dad for so long that it doesn't have the same impact as if it came from an outsider.
  4. You have a large family and need help teaching your children. At times, having one or more children participating in outside courses provides the opportunity for you to work with your other children on a deeper level. This can provide a benefit to both the children taking the course and the children at home.

When selecting an outside teacher or course, you'll want to carefully think through all of the ramifications. Weighing the pros and cons makes a great of sense in this sort of situation. Below of some of the aspects I consider when selecting courses for my children and there are probably even more that are specific to your family's needs and desires.

  • Can you afford the course? It's sad to have your student start a course and then have to pull him due to the inability to pay. It affects your child, the other children in the class, the teacher and the child that might not have been able to get into the class due to enrollment limits.  Although many families go through financial crisis at some point, it's important to ascertain ahead of time whether you can really afford the outside lessons for the duration of the course. Be sure you understand ahead of time any books or materials that may add to the expense of the course.
  • Is this a course in which your child can succeed? Sometimes, we are overzealous and want something for our children for which they may not be quite ready. I see this often with middle school students and parents wanting them to start high school courses in 6th and 7th grade. This can be appropriate for some students, but often it happens because the parent is worried the class won't be offered when the child is truly ready to take it. It's important for your child to succeed away from home. Be sure that he is ready for what the course requires.
  • Can you and/or your child afford the time away from home? Parents who haven't used outside resources previously often underestimate the time it takes to travel. As well, most courses require a serious amount of homework time that will take away from family and other studies. Be sure that you have a complete understanding of what your student will be expected to accomplish outside of the classroom. Also take into account whether there are outside projects and such that require meeting with other students in addition to class time.
  • Is the instructor someone you want teaching your child? Outside instructors often have a tremendous impact, both positive and negative, on home school students because they are presented as immediate authority. My daughter loved every person who taught her. She had tremendous respect for her teachers and for good reason; they were awesome people who deserved her respect. But I was very particular about to whom I gave that authority. When we visited a local college, considering Ally for dual enrollment, my impression of the instructors was not very positive. I felt she wasn't ready to be immersed in that environment even with her maturity level. Ally would've loved to have gone to college with those credits and she was certainly capable of the work required, but the possible impact of such instructors at an early age concerned more than receiving credits.

If you haven't used outside teachers previously, there are some practical steps you can take when deciding who to use and what courses to select. Other parents and students can be excellent resources if you know they have the same value system as your family. When my son wanted to take drama and Spanish this year, I not only went to trusted parents who had put their children with these teachers, but I also interviewed students to see what they felt they learned if anything. Students will often be more straightforward and will point out both the positive and negative aspects. As well, they are actually in the classroom. Do be choosy about who you approach. Some people are very critical no matter how valuable the course or the teacher, and try to talk to at least 3-4 different people Of course, speak with students who are responsible and studious.

Consider interviewing the teacher ahead of time to be sure that you have the same philosophies concerning instruction and spiritual issues. I once spent three hours with an instructor on the phone and he was certain my daughter was ready for his course. In the end, although I believed him to be a godly and talented man, I felt that at the time he would certainly overwhelm my daughter who was several years younger than his average student.

Preview the curriculum used in the class. Don't assume that a Christian teacher will use Christian curriculum. Most teachers use what they're most comfortable teaching. I write my own curriculum and design my own courses and parents often ask me for a booklist beforehand. If you want a certain curriculum, be sure to connect with the instructor before enrolling your student.

Finally, determine what you want your child to achieve through the course and decide if it's possible using a specific instructor and curriculum. If you don't have a clear view going in, the waters may become muddy and you'll end up frustrated by the end if your expectations weren't met.

Once you have your child in an outside course, there are a few things you can do to assist your child and the teacher.

  1. Communicate well with the instructor. Even with high school students, it's important for the parents to understand what is going on with the course and the student. If you have concerns or family issues that pop up, communicate as quickly as possible for the best results. Most instructors are very sympathetic and will work with you and your student if they know what is happening ahead of time.
  2. Pray for the class and the instructor. Teaching, as we all know, is a challenging calling and burn out rates are high. Prayer can make all of the difference! Letting the instructor know that you're praying is a sweet gesture and most encouraging.
  3. Encourage your student to do his best and assist, as necessary, particularly with organization. As students take more courses, they become more proficient at managing paperwork and such. Early on, your child may need some guidance in this area so he is organized and prepared for classes.

Utilizing outside resources can be truly beneficial for home school families. As always, prayerfully consider any such steps you might take with your children and be sure you understand both the positive and negative possibilities. As well, once you have put your child in an outside class, commit to making it best experience for everyone involved by praying and be involved.

Many blessings on your week!

Beth

 

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March 7, 2008

What About Bad Attitudes?

What Do You Do When Your
Child Has a Bad Attitude About Schoolwork?

  What do you do when a your child has a bad attitude about doing his schoolwork, his chores, or anything else you've asked him to do?  I confess, my initial reaction is not usually pleasant, although I am working on that.  Of course, it has be the child's problem, right? After all, I am the mature one…   

Actually, over the years I have learned that the most profitable thing to do first is examine is my own attitude and expectations. Am I giving this child enough help and attention, or am I more focused on other tasks I want to accomplish during school time? Am I short-tempered or critical because I'm in a hurry or unhappy about being "interrupted, again?" Do I have too many other activities and commitments to be able to focus on my children and their education? (Ouch!) If this makes you wince, pray for yourself and your child(ren), and ask God to give you insight and wisdom into this situation. Believe me, He will do it.  

Secondly, talk with your child about his attitude, and really listen to what he says. Is she hungry? Tired? Lonely? Overwhelmed? Sometimes there is a physical or psychological reason that can easily be dealt with by a snack and/or a little focused attention. If it involves more than that, at least you will convey to your child that he is more important to you than the completion of his grammar lesson.  

Thirdly, determine if this is a character issue.  If it is, it's critical to identify and take steps to remedy the problem.  God's Word is very clear on the issues of anger and rebellion, and I believe the heart condition of a child is more important than his math facts. Teach scripture and train in righteousness.  Have him memorize pertinent verses and hold him, your other children, and yourself, to a standard of kind and cheerful speech.  Teach and reteach that "obedience" is the following: when you give an instruction, a child looks you in the eye and says "Yes, ma'am,"  (I'm living in South Carolina) or "Yes, Mom," and then immediately begins the task. 

As well, this is a prudent time to get the principal involved. Whether Dad helps with academics or not, it's critical for him to be aware, involved, and supportive of your goals and struggles with each of your students.Your children need to know they will answer to Dad for a poor attitude or negligent work.  One of the systems  we've had in place in our home during the 'younger years' to facilitate communication is a weekly "Presentation Night." Children have the opportunity to share what they've learned that week and present reports, and Dad has a chance to praise and encourage, as well as peruse any test papers and ask about any substandard work. 

Lastly, use positive motivation and incentive.  Try to catch your student doing something positive, such as working quietly, completing an assignment independently or quickly, speaking kindly, or having a helpful attitude with a sibling.  When those occasions occur, we generally make do with a warm hug and verbal recognition, but you may want to take it to the next level.  A system of tally marks or stickers per incidence with a "store" of small items, where those tallies can be redeemed at the end of the week, may work well with your child. 

With realistic expectations, a calm, organized and attentive mom, consistent training and good modeling, you should be able to see improvement in your child's attitude. And if you are anything like me, you might even grow a bit in the process.

Still learning,

Dana

 

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March 4, 2008

The Big Decision

It is one of the biggest decisions homeschool families have to make. I know parents who literally spend years of prayer and have many hours of discussion before making such a choice. This particular decision can change the life of a child in ways we cannot always comprehend…in both positive and negative aspects. I believe that other than choosing to homeschool, it is one of the most challenging determinations for some families to make.

Should we homeschool through high school?

After talking with parents, it amazed me that such competent, loving and devout believers struggle with this issue. I don't mean that in a critical way, but for me it was a no-brainer. Now, many of you will say that my confidence comes from having taught school. But in reality, my confidence comes from the Lord. For me, I read the scripture, Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6 NAS), and noticed that "child" was not defined as "until he is in high school". Before I get anyone really riled up, let me answer one question. Do I believe that every family should homeschool in high school? Well, to be honest, it doesn't matter what I believe…it's what you believe and where God leads your family. However, I do think that we often do things in this life for worldly reasons, particularly when it comes to our children. We teach them about eternity, but are we showing them how to live it out? This is a conviction that has long plagued me, especially when it comes to making difficult, life changing decisions. While teaching my children through high school wasn't one of those decisions, I have plenty of others. So, as you read on, please do not see me as standing in judgment of whether you homeschool high school or not, but rather as a presenter of ideas to open up a possible train of thought and aid you in carefully thinking through your decision.

Reasons that people have given me for sending their kids to public high school:

1. I can't homeschool high school. I barely made it through myself.  While I understand your thinking, it's not true in many cases. (At least the first part!)There is a great fear about high school because suddenly accountability is so high. Credits must be earned to get into college. I remember when I had to teach Geometry to Ally . It was a nightmare for me initially because I didn't understand Geometry when I took it. I just don't think that way. However, I really had to give that class over to the Lord. I didn't know about great interactive curriculum like Teaching Textbooks and Math U See at the time. I think we used a BJU textbook. But we made it through and I learned a great deal! Was I the most qualified teacher for Ally in this subject area? Definitely not!  Was I the person who was supposed to be teaching her this subject? I believe so. God doesn't just fill in the gaps where we are weak, He gives us the Holy Spirit to pray us through those weaknesses and ask for the things that we cannot even express!  In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. (Romans 8:26 NIV) God has also provided others to assist me in homeschooling. Ally and I will always have a special place in our hearts for Marie Owens, homeschool mom and College of Charleston professor because she did Ally's biology labs with her. Marie not only encouraged Ally in her love for science, but she was such an example of a scientist who loves the Lord. Next year, my son is taking Chemistry from another mom and teacher. When I met her, I praised God for her and will continue to do so!  Between local teachers, online courses and well written curriculum, I firmly believe that anyone who has the desire and trusts in the Lord can homeschool through high school, despite perceived educational weaknesses.

2. I have smaller children and I really don't have the time. I was recently reading a book about business consulting by Dr. Alan Weiss. He goes beyond business in the book and really addresses the heart of any person's life when he says. "When you say you don't have time to see your kids' events, you really mean that other things are more important and you've decided not see their events." Now, he is speaking of priorities and business people who neglect their families for work with the excuse of "I don't have the time." We make time for the things that are most vital to all of us in this life. We prioritize without thought sometimes. Imagine that you have found the time for your child for the last 13 years and yet, when it comes to high school, you don't have it. You have invested so much into someone and then "lost" that time somewhere? Ironically, I have found that even though my children have taken the bulk of their high school courses with me and not outside the home, I spent less time on school with them in high school than any other school years. My time is more concentrated and thought out, but I make it despite being a full time freelance writer, half of Epi Kardia, teacher of other children and all of those other things we all do for church, friends, family etc. I am not super woman…not even close. Many of you with your multitude of children deserve that title much more than me, but I do ask God continually to help me prioritize. If you feel certain that God wants you to place other priorities over educating your high schooler then you are where you should be. If not, I would advise more prayer about it before making the decision.

3. My teen is well grounded in his faith and I see public high school as a mission field for him. Imagine how many other teens he can impact! I think that of all of the reasons I have heard in defense of not homeschooling high school, this is the one that affects me the most. The term that comes to mind is "leading the lamb to the slaughter." If God calls you to be an Abraham and to sacrifice your Isaac, by all means, obey Him. That is always the truth…obey God. He will always honor you for it. However, I would be absolutely certain that you are hearing God's voice in this. In most cases, public school is a battle ground and you are sending your child into battle. I have taught in public school and it truly is a mission field, but before you put your teen into that mission field, be sure that God is supporting that mission. I often visualize myself standing before God as a parent, knowing that He will hold me accountable for who my children become in this world. If I do not make discipling them a priority, how can I ever disciple others effectively? I know that I have and will make many errors as a parent, but I'd rather those errors be out of ignorance, not choice.

4. My teen wants to play sports and he can't play it outside of school. At least this is logical, although rather worldly. If your child is destined to be the next NBA star, God is not going to let school choice stop him. This is one of those areas when I feel we become more worldly than wise. I know of many high school homeschoolers whose children are very active in sports through private leagues and recreation departments. Some private schools allow outside students to play. My son currently practices Lacrosse with a private school because he likes their attitude better than the recreation department league. I called the school and asked, and they said "Yes." I praised God for that! It was an answer to prayer that took some time, but the wait was worth it.

Reasons that I have heard for why people homeschool high school include:

1. For his [her son's] emotional and psychological wellbeing. I was so afraid of him getting lost in the system and falling through the cracks. I felt like no one really cared about him or his education. -Sharon, a homeschool mom who pulled her son out of public school in his sophomore year.

2. The main reasons we homeschool in high school are we really enjoyed home schooling and the kids wanted to continue; they felt like they had superior learning and with outside classes with other kids, they wanted to maintain the strong relationships they had developed.  They had time to be involved in youth groups and we liked the flexibility. I had actually told my children we would not home school in high school, but once the doors opened up with what they needed, we found a comfort level making that commitment. I would sum it up as just a different quality of life.  -Sandy, a homeschool mom who has homeschooled from earlier years.

3. The reasons for homeschooling in high school do not change from homeschooling in earlier years. They're basically the same reasons we started homeschooling to begin with. First of all, we feel like God's called us to it. Secondly, we enjoy it. We love having our son with us, being involved in his education and him being part of our everyday lives. -Susan, a homeschool mom who's son started out in private Christian school.

4. As she was wondering about going to public high school, we prayed with my oldest during her last year of middle school.  As parents, we did not have  peace about sending her to high school–why would we give her up now, during this crucial time?  As she prayed, she came to the conclusion on her own that her prayer and study time with the Lord would be drastically limited if she went to public school. (Besides, they wouldn't let her go in pajamas.)Those high school years were among the most precious with her–God blessed her mightily, in many ways, as well as blessing us with a very close relationship as a result of that time together. –Dana, the other half of Epi Kardia.   

Finally, if you're interested, I should include the reasons we homeschool. A calling from God is definitely the main reason for our homeschooling. Establishing strong relationships with my children beyond the norm, being able to disciple them on a near to full time basis and taking responsibility for their entire education, spiritually, emotionally and academically, all affected our homeschool decision. To be honest, John Paul and I, the only ones at home at this point, also enjoy the flexibility of creating our own days without the government telling us when to do what. 

I hope that this blog has been thought provoking and encouraging. Prayerful consideration and trust in the Lord will never lead you astray. I pray this for you, our readers, as well as for Dana and me.

Many blessings!

Beth

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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February 26, 2008

Are Your Expectations Causing Frustration?

Frustration is often defined as unmet expectations. A pretty practical definition, I think. For my personality, it's definitely an accurate definition. Whether it's my children, my colleagues, my family or myself, I get very frustrated when I expect something to work out and it doesn't.  My children will never forget the multitude of plans and schedules that I have produced believing that those tools will be the answers to elminating my frustration. Well, it has taken me more years than I care to admit to come to the realization that my expectations cause more frustration than anything or anyone else.

When Ally was in high school, around the end of her sophomore year, she developed this habit of writing down quotations that inspired her onto notecards and sticking the notecards on memo boards all around her bedroom. I would occasionally tour her room (when I could wade throught the piles of clothing and books) and read her current finds. Most often she gave credit for the quotations on the card and many incredible names appeared over the years, from great authors to theologians, to missionaries. One day I noticed a quotation without any name credited. It read something like "The goal is not perfection, but it's the striving that counts."  I don't even remember it verbatim, but at the time, I thought it held some wisdom. Ally wasn't home at that moment, but I carried those words with me for a week or so, thinking about my own challenges as an overachiever. I had always been an overachiever, even as a young child. My goal was to please my parents and "A"s did it most of the time. My mother also loved to see me receive awards and appear in the newspaper, although she never really had to push me. I was born striving to please, I believe. Nevertheless, a week or so after seeing the quotation, I asked Ally one day where she had found it, and to my total astonishment, she responded with a chuckle, "Mom, you said that to me."

Major epiphany moment there! I don't know which surprised me more, that those words came out of my mouth or that Ally heard them! I am still often surprised at the importance that my children place on my words (now, that's another whole blog topic in itself). I do have a great deal of respect for my daughter. I believe God has instilled wisdom and a heart in her beyond her years. After some thought, I decided that if Ally valued those words, I should at least try to live by them. It's a tremendous struggle for me because I have "to the moon, out of this world" expectations of myself. My son, John Paul, continually points out that my to do list is an impossibility and it would make a normal human being give up before starting. He is probably right, but I have come to some compromises over the years that I would like to share with you, just in case your unmet expectations are causing you frustration.

1. I do keep a major to do list but I have learned to view it as things I'd like to see done rather than things that have to be done in a day. I derive a great deal of pleasure from crossing things off of lists. I like that sense of accomplishment. However, now I can finish the day without finishing the list. God is gracious…He will either give me tomorrow to work on it or He will remove me from this earth and I won't have to worry about to do lists anymore. It's a win-win situation.

2. Some days, I make a "got done" list rather than a to do list. I simply write down everything I do in a day from quiet time to laundry to school to teaching courses to writing articles to designing curriculum to answering email to making dinner to working out to… Let me tell you, that got done list can be a joyous thing. You will sleep better at night after reading it because some days feel like nothing was accomplished and yet, that never seems to be the case.

3. I listen to those I love. When my son says things like "I just can't be perfect", it's a signal. He doesn't know it, but it represents to me a time when I am clearly causing him serious frustration and my expectations should be examined. They are most likely too high. Learning to evaluate my own expectations in any given situation has allowed me great freedom…it's allowed me to admit that I am heading in the wrong direction and need to make a change. It's also been a celebration as I see it happening less and less.

4. I don't compare myself to others. I have been in some situations over the last few years where other people have compared me to themselves in work ethic, priorities, etc. For some time, it really weighed me down and caused me to feel that I was just not up to par. Don't let anyone do that to you. God created each of us uniquely and if you are listening to Him, you will know where your priorities should lie and what you should be accomplishing in this life. I spent many years of my life trying to meet other's expectations of what they believed me to be. I am not blaming anyone else because I let it happen, but even after many years, I have finally learned from it.  God has expectations of you. Time with Him will reveal those expectations and they are the only ones with which you need to be concerned.

5. I don't panic when it doesn't seem to work. I could give you lists of events, deadlines, etc. that caused me to work late into the night, to neglect my family and to harm my own health because I went into panic mode. It was only later that I would see my over-reaction and the detriment of it to myself and others I love. It's not worth it. All things happen in God's time…as humans, we have such a limited sense of time. We are foolish when we try to take control of it.

Jesus was on the tightest schedule known to man with the greatest job ever. His to do list included his own persecution and painful death. These two facts help me start each day with the hope that my concerns and worries are in God's hands, that my goals are in line with His will and that at the end of the day, He will be pleased with me. I pray that for each of you. God bless!

Beth

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February 18, 2008

How Fine are the Fine Arts?

I remember when my now college student, Ally, was in 4th grade and we had just begun home schooling.  Ally and I poured over curriculum and researched so many different approaches that I felt like I was back in school!  One of the things that caught my attention early on was the idea of incorporating fine arts education into home schooling.  Even though she had come from a private school, Ally didn't have much of a fine arts education. She loved and still loves to paint and draw (a quality she received from my mother…definitely not me!).That was about as much fine art as we had in our home.  I had been teaching about eight years at that time and never considered fine arts in the classroom because there just wasn't any time for it. However, with the whole new world of home schooling in front of us, leaving behind bells and lines and required curriculum, I felt a tremendous sense of freedom and decided, yes, we definitely needed fine arts in our studies. 

I began to educate myself by the most sensible way I knew at that point…going to the library.  I checked out books on artists from a variety of time periods, read books about how to evaluate art, discovered the great composers and brought home hoards of materials.  Although I never had a passion for the fine arts, I have always had a passion for learning, so began my art and music education. I tried to recall my college art appreciation class and only remembered my grade for the one major paper. 

Below are the major points that I learned through that process and over the years to come concerning fine arts in our home. 

1.  Each family should define "fine arts" in their own way. Some of the great blessings of home schooling are that you can put the emphasis where you choose and you can develop your schooling program around your family's core beliefs and values without concern about what others are doing or think. Case in point, I don't think Andy Warhol was much of an artist.  It's not just that I don't like his style, I just don't see the great art potential in his work. There's not much there to even analyze for me. However, I really love Norman Rockwell.  His ability to catch the human spirit in expression and activity totally blows me away. I can look at his work repeatedly and find new things to enjoy every time. Crazily enough, by the world's standards Andy Warhol is an artist and Norman Rockwell is an illustrator (basically because his most popular work was on magazine covers). Now, you may strongly disagree.  You may have Campbell Soup renditions all over your house and spend hours each day delighted by their vibrant colors and realness. Or you may find Norman Rockwell bland and unoriginal because he chose real people as his subjects and really did do his best work for The Saturday Evening Post. That's the beauty of it. Determining which art is fine for your family is your decision.

2. Just because they're naked doesn't mean they're art. Artists have painted the human body in a variety of ways and sculpted them in even more variations. If nudity determines artistic credence, then you can find plenty of fine art in convenience store magazine racks. There is a major difference, although I have met "artists" who don't agree, between admiring God's handiwork in the beautiful creation of the human body and simply painting nude people because others will look at them.

3. Just because they're naked doesn't mean they're not art. I am not legalistic about the presentation of the human body. I did not have a problem explaining Michelangelo's David to my children. However, there have definitely been graphic paintings and provocative sculptures that I deemed inappropriate. Children are often fascinated by the human body and presenting it in a God created expression through art can be very healthy. Other presentations create pictures in their minds that are not easily removed.

4. Art and Music are excellent tools for teaching discernment. These are great areas for demonstrating the worldly vs. godly viewpoints. Art and Music with violent or graphic themes may still be considered art and music, but that does not mean they're appropriate for a believer's heart to embrace. Teaching our children from early on that ungodly examples exist in literature, fine art, movies etc. can only benefit them. I am amazed at how many parents allow their children to read poorly written books with negative, sometimes even anti-God themes, and rationalize it by saying "At least he's reading". Whether we're looking at art, listening to music, reading a book or watching a movie, none of those activities are valuable in themselves. What our mind and heart processes through the experience is the valuable component.

5. "Exposure" has not been proven a good teacher. I was a teacher when the government decided that exposing elementary age children to drugs and how those drugs affect people would prevent the children from using drugs later. The same decision was made about AIDs and safe sex. It didn't take long to realize that simply exposing children to something isn't quite the same as educating them.  As well, a child can be educated about many things without having to be exposed to them. Simply exposing your children to art and music, even the really good stuff, won't necessarily do much.  Interaction and communication are better teachers.  Discussing why something is considered art or considered fine, leading your child to examine art and listen closely to music, and integrating fine arts with writing or other academic areas will all produce a higher quality of education than visiting a multitude of museums and simply showing them.

6. Go with your gut. If a work of art makes you feel uncomfortable or evokes negative emotions, go with your instincts and prayerfully consider whether it won't cause the same emotional reaction for your child.

As parents and teachers, we have a tremendous responsibility to not only educate our children but also to train them to educate themselves. When we look at any component of their education, we want to make sure that their education has real value. Teaching or doing something because other families do or simply as a desire to instill as much knowledge as possible into our children will not produce the best results. As you decide what components are incorporated in your child's education, don't overlook the arts. However, remember that a Christ centered education means that all aspects of study relate back to God and His will.

If you'd like to view some fine arts options online, check out Epi Kardia's resource links where you can visit The Louvre, take a virtual tour through the National Gallery of Art and more!  Just go to www.epikardia.com/links.htm .

 

 

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January 29, 2008

Reluctant Writers - Part 3 High School and Beyond

Don't panic!  I often use that phrase when talking to parents about their high school students, particularly when the subject of writing is involved.  High school brings about a whole new type of anxiety.  The clock seems to tick faster and many times, the student seems to be much less concerned about getting an education than the parent.  Let me reiterate…don't panic!  You are not in control, but that's okay…God is!

My daughter was not a reluctant writer in high school.  She was a major overachiever and while writing was not a love for her as it is for me, she wanted to please her parents and God.  Academics came easily in most cases and when something was challenging, she had serious self motivation. Little did I know that my son would be the opposite.  He has a wonderful imagination and sometimes even a good attitude, but he simply doesn't like transferring ideas from his head to paper.  It is time consuming.  It is frustrating.  It is not fun.  It is, to put it simply, outright hard.  So, what's a parent or teacher to do?

To begin with, read Part 2 of this series.  There are many ideas in that article that apply to high schoolers as well: limiting assignments, using high interest topics, and communicating clearly and often.  But high school writers are not middle school writers and they need to be treated differently in some ways.

1.  Self-editing - This skill is vital for high school students to acquire, even reluctant writers.  As with all difficult areas, begin small.  Have your student only edit for capitalization the first go around.  With every assignment, add something new to look for including punctuation, sentence structure, spelling, etc.  For Epi Kardia users, there is a self-editing tool that you can adapt and use.  It is on the Tools CD or in the Epi Kardia Parent's Manual tools section. Begin with self-editing smaller assignments and move on to longer ones as your student begins to build confidence.

2.  Modeling - Whether you realize it or not, your high school student is watching you closely.  I didn't realize this until my daughter was at college and we talked about it.  Make sure that your high schooler sees you writing, even if it's just email.  Let him or her "catch" you reading your email aloud back to yourself so that you can edit it.  For boys, it is even more important for them to see Dad or male siblings doing this.  Boys often develop an attitude that academics, and especially writing, are "girl" things.  You probably self-edit without even thinking about it.  I rarely send an email without reading it aloud.  It is not uncommon for my child to walk in and find me talking to the computer. Okay…sometimes it's frustration! :) However, it's often me reading my writing aloud. 

3.  Ask your high schooler for help - I know this sounds odd, particularly for a reluctant writer. However, when a student perceives himself as needed, it builds confidence.  You may ask your student to help out by reading a short assignment from a younger sibling or even something you have written yourself.  Obviously, you don't want to ask him to do something that is beyond his ability at the time, so be sure to work through basic self-editing skills prior to making such a request.

Why all of this focus on editing?  Students who can edit their own work feel better about themselves and build confidence.  Editing is a different skill than writing and it is not uncommon for a reluctant writer, at this level, to understand how writing should look without being excited about doing it himself.  As well, the more editing practice that occurs the better the writing skills later.

4.  Essay writing - the basic essay styles (expository, narrative, persuasive, comparison/contrast and descriptive) are vital for high school students to master.  

  • Work on the styles one by one moving from simplest in form (expository, narrative and descriptive) to more difficult (persuasive and comparison/contrast).  Most students like certain styles over others which is natural.  Be as encouraging as possible when your student finds a style that fits his personality and consider even adding an additional assignment to fit that style.  It will build confidence.  Allow more time for the styles that do not appeal to your student.
  • Before beginning any essay writing, read through examples of essays in that style to help your student have a very clear understanding of the format.  Reassure your student that there will be multiple draft opportunities to get it right. 
  • Outlining is essential for every student (different outline types are discussed in the Epi Kardia Parent's Manual) and mastering this skill will provide structure and again, build confidence in a reluctant writer's ability to get the assignment completed.
  • Consider writing an essay together.  While this may feel like pulling teeth, it is well worth the effort.  It will also remind you of how challenging it can be to complete such assignment, insuring future compassion from you!  :)
  • Vary essay lengths. Many schools push the 5 paragraph essay and yet, most colleges prefer a student with a more varied writing style.  Encourage your student to write shorter and longer essays.  You may even want to start with a mini-essay of only three paragraphs.  Descriptive essays are good candidates for this writing assignment.
  • Be patient.  Yes, the clock is ticking, but four years of high school can include a wide variety of experiences.  Also remember that your student will grow and mature more in those four years so every problem need not be tackled in the freshman year.

5.  Practical writing skills allow a high school student to practice writing without the pressure of a graded assignment.  Thank you notes, emailing correspondence (yes, you can say that no emails will be sent to relatives without being edited first), writing a resume, even writing a description for selling an item on Ebay or in the newspaper can be valuable experience. 

6.  Tie writing into what your student loves.  If your student has a strong interest in music, have him write song lyrics.  If he loves to read, relate assignments to his free time reading rather than books from his literature class.  I once discovered that a writing student of mine, who perceived himself as a non-writer, could write technical material explaining the complex workings of a paintball gun like a pro.  He soon realized that he was definitely a writer and could continue on to other things, but his love for paint ball brought out skills he didn't realize he had.  Sometimes removing the focus from the writing itself and putting it on the highly interesting subject can be all it takes for a student to get the job done.

7.  Research papers are a fact of high school life.  The great thing about a research paper is that it can be broken down into smaller components and worked on a little at a time.  See the Epi Kardia Parent's Manual for more information about how to teach a research paper assignment.  Most students take a semester to write a paper, but for a reluctant writer, consider taking up to one school year.  There are no rules about how long it should take, but a college bound high school student should have at least two research papers under his belt by graduation.  For reluctant writers, the topic will make all of the difference.  With the first experience, most definitely allow the student to select the topic.  You may want him to give you a list of possibilities and you narrow it down, but it should be topic of interest.  Keep the first research paper shorter (6-10 pages) for a reluctant writer.  Even a shorter paper will seem overwhelming.  Communicate clearly about how there will be significant time and the work will be broken up with smaller deadlines throughout the year, then stick with those deadlines as much as possible.  If there is an issue keeping the deadline, don't let it be a result of your neglect (not having something graded on time, not getting your student to the library, etc.).  Nothing is more discouraging to a student than being told that his work is so important but perceiving by your actions or lack of action that the work is not.  Grade each segment of the process because there is less pressure with multiple grades than one major grade.

8.  Considered writing projects or paired writing. Often high school students will contribute more and gain more confidence if they are not alone in their endeavors.  Discuss this with your student prior to making any decisions.  If your student is adamant about not wanting to write with another student, don't push it.  In my experience, however, most students feel less pressure when more than one person is involved.

9.  Look into writing courses.  This may seem odd for a student who is already insecure about his abilities, but again, I have found through teaching high school writing courses that male students, in particular, respond better in a structured, class setting.  They often work harder because they do not want to appear incapable in front of their peers.  It is essential to interview the instructor if you have a truly reluctant writer.  Reluctant writers tend to achieve more with teachers who have a sense of humor and are encouraging, without allowing the student to deviate from the course.  Grace and understanding when a student is struggling balanced with accountability is not always easy to find in an instructor, but definitely not impossible.  Talking with other parents and students about instructors is typically wise.  Just remember that every parent is not looking for the same qualities in a teacher, so be sure to decide what is most important to you before making a decision.

Teaching a high school student is truly a sacrificial act for many parents.  When that student is a reluctant writer, the jewels on the crown increase exponentially!  Just remember that this is only aspect of your student and that you both will make it through with prayer, patience and time.  Feel free to email me through Epi Kardia (epikardia@bellsouth.net) if you have any specific relucant writer questions or situations. God bless and know that the fruit of your labor will not go unnoticed! 

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January 18, 2008

A Precious Hope

Dear Friends,

For those of you who know me, you know that I am a rather practical person and not always great with the personal side.  I can get very task oriented and forget about why we're all really here…to glorify our Lord and Savior, and to enjoy Him forever.  This past year has been one of the most challenging for me personally and for my family, overall.  I know many others feel the same. As I began putting together goals for myself for the coming year, I realized that I am so hopeful, so much more than in past years.  Although my life has changed a great deal, the hope does not come from those changes, many of which were very difficult to work through.  The hope comes from faith…faith in a God so great and awesome that it is impossible not to be hopeful. 

I am often distracted by the world…work to be done, finances, my children's schedules, even politics and news can envelope me without much effort.  Gratefully, God is ever patient, redirecting me regularly with His word and His Spirit.

I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling, and my message and my preaching were not in persuasive words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and the power, so that your faith would not rest on the wisdom of men, but on the power of God. (1 Corinthians 2:3-5)

As a writer and teacher, I have always valued wisdom.  I have always felt that a real education can overcome so many ills of this world.  But education, or anything else for that matter, without faith in our Lord and Savior and reliance upon Christ, is worthless.  I pray that our curriculum would encourage parents to incorporate education into Christ, not just Christ into education.

Life can be so hard some times…children with terminal illnesses, tragic youth without guidance, friends and family with cancer, our young people at war in foreign lands, unresolved personal conflicts and more, but this is not our eternity and we should never treat it as such. My prayer is that as we begin this year in hope, that our faith will grow and more hope comes with that, creating a cycle that centers on Christ.  

Finally, brethren, rejoice, be made complete, be comforted, be like-minded, live in peace and the God of love and peace will be with you. The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit, be with you all. (2 Corinthians 13:11,14)

Blessings on a hopeful and Christ filled New Year!

Beth

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January 8, 2008

Reluctant Writers-Part 2-The Middle Years

Reluctant writers often become more reluctant after elementary school.  Due to other physical and emotional changes, academics, in general, can be challenging at this age.  Writing, especially with the idea of editing and rewriting, brings on its own anxiety.  Amazingly enough, it is possible to get through these years productively with a reluctant writer.  Creative assignments, encouraging teaching, prayer and patience all come in handy!

Beginning a written assignment can be the most difficult step. 

1.  Discuss the assignment thoroughly and explain not only what must be done but also what is expected.  Often students fear academic work because there isn't enough direction or because the expectations seem too high.  Discussing the process of completing the written assignment can be helpful.  For example, you might tell your student that he will be writing a short report about a famous American.  Often, teachers and parents stop at this point thinking they have provided enough necessary information.  For a reluctant writer, immediate questions come to mind: What is a report exactly?  What does "short" mean?  About which famous American am I supposed to write?  Anxiety builds as the student imagines the difficulties related to the written work. Continued explanation and discussion including the following could help relieve some of that stress as well as teach the process of writing:

a. Length of the assignment, written or typed including formatting details (font size, spacing, etc.)

b. Date(s) due - for long assignments have due dates for different steps and drafts.  Remember to keep the date reasonable but not so far out that the student can procrastinate.

c. Brainstorm possible topics with your student.   Many students express concerns about having to select their own topics, especially at this age.

d. Discuss where to find Research materials and be sure that your student has sufficient access.

e. Prepare your student for editing and rewriting but don't dwell on it.  Rewriting is typically the most difficult phase for a middle school reluctant writer because they believe that once written, the assignment is complete.  Early preparation can prevent later disputes.

2. Keep initial assignments short and break up longer assignments.  More extensive work can be broken into smaller assignments such as outlining, research and note taking (this can be broken down by resource if general note taking is too overwhelming), writing the introduction, writing the body of the paper (can be broken down by paragraphs or outline topics), writing the conclusion, drafts (2 or more, as appropriate), and the final draft.  For more information about the steps or process of writing, including evaluation, see the Epi Kardia Parent's Manual.

3. Stay on top of your student's progress.  Be encouraging as you correct along the way.  Reluctant writers need to know that they are being evaluated regularly or they lose momentum.  When correcting, be as gentle as possible and always point out something that the student did well.

4. Focus on one or two areas for correction.  With each draft, decide what you will be most concerned about and let the student know.  Areas of concern could be:  content of writing, sentence structure, paragraph development, grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc. If you note every mistake, especially on the initial draft, your student may become overly discouraged.

5. Let your student keyboard rather than write manually.  Keyboarding is typically faster and is definitely easier when making changes to drafts.  Professional writers use keyboards, so why not students? The only exception to this will be examined in the next installment concerning high school and SAT essays.

6. For middle and high school students, let them use grammar and spell check.  Such tools reinforce correct spelling and usage despite concerns that they allow students to be lazy.  That is not typically true.

Creative assignments are also beneficial when working with reluctant writers.  Consider using some of the following: 

·          Journaling:  daily journal writing instills the habit of writing, which is a beneficial life long skill.

·          Letters: thank you notes and invitations.  A pen pal can easily meet this need!

·          Responding to fine art, music, poetry and movies

·      Lapbooks: offers shorter writing assignments that can be compiled into one larger assignment when complete.          

·          Alternate story endings: have your student rewrite the ending to a story or book you have read.

  ·       Point of View:  write about an event from someone or something else’s point of view.  For example, write about King Arthur from the round table’s point of view or rewrite a fable, such as The Lion and the Mouse from the mouse’s point of view. 

·          Poetry, Psalms, and Riddles: practice writing verse after studying different types.

·          Recipe books:  this idea offers opportunities for organizing written information, writing directions, and using correct abbreviations.  Extra idea:  put recipes in your book from each of the different historical time periods.

·          Snoring! Boring!:  This assignment requires that Mom or Dad write a very boring paragraph first and then the student rewrites the paragraph making it more interesting. 

·          Family newsletter:  send it to family members.  This is sort of a lapbook using desktop publishing.

·          Advertisements:  this type of writing is an opportune first step to persuasive writing.  Initially, you will want to discuss different advertisements and what makes them effective with your student.

Note that the above ideas were taken from the Epi Kardia Parent's Manual.  See the manual for more ideas!

Communication and discussion with reluctant writers is essential!  Even if they appear to not want to talk through assignments, the rewards will be seen later.  Sometimes it is best to actually allow the student to discuss his ideas and exactly what he is going to write prior to beginning an assignment.  With seriously reluctant writers, you may need to talk him through the writing as he's doing it.  In such cases, shorter assignments are best until confidence is developed.  Allowing a student to record his thoughs on tape prior to writing can also be useful.

The goal for this age group is preparation for more serious writing of essays and research papers in high school.  A large part of this preparation is developing a taste, if not a love, for writing.  With reluctant writers, the idea that writing isn't going away and he might as well do what he can with it may be the most you will get.  However, even that is progress!  The reality of having to write daily is difficult for reluctant writers and their teachers.  Yet, that is exactly what needs to be done.  Communicate well, keep assignments shorter until success has been achieved, be encouraging, and provide consistent daily assignments to prevent a relucant middle school writer from becoming a seriously challenging high school student!

 

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