Parenting/Homeschooling In General

A Homeschool Graduate Looks Back

Tuesday, March 3rd, 2009

Most of us wonder how homeschooling through high school will affect our children, especially if our children think they might like to join the rank and file in public high school instead of continuing to be schooled at home. We often wish we could look ahead and see how it will turn out before we take that leap of faith. As a follow up to my recent post about what I loved about homeschooling, I would like to share a comment from a current college student who was homeschooled through high school (who just happens to be my daughter). LOL I hope it will prove to be as encouraging to you as it was to me! And thank you, Sweetie, for taking the time and effort to make the comment and for allowing us to post it!

…Reading [your ten] inspired me to think of my own 10 Reasons of Why I love Homeschooling! I apologize if they are a little wordy but I hope it is helpful to read some from a student’s perspective!

1. My education had a spiritual element that gave it depth and eternal significance. It was an instrument in the hand of the Lord to teach me more about Him and the world He created. Everything I learned was part of a greater and more glorious big picture!

2. Getting to spend sweet times together with my family was part of my daily routine.

3. My classmates were my best friends and their siblings. They were of all ages and often possessed a rare maturity and authenticity.

4. The supportive home schooling community felt like a big family. My teachers were moms and dads that I looked up to and I knew loved and cared about me.

5. It gave me a beautiful picture of the incredibly heroic and important calling that God places on a wife and mother.

6. Learning was an exciting, never ending endeavor. It was defined as a life-long pursuit instead of a chore.

7. It provided me the flexibility to explore topics that interested me and allowed me more control over what I wanted to study.

8. An emphasis was placed on personal character development and integrity. I learned many valuable life lessons that could never have been gleaned from textbooks.

9. Opportunities for class credit popped up everywhere! A trip to the grocery store became a lesson in financial management and a fun trip to a historic plantation was a field trip for history (as long as we promised to read every plaque and write a summary paper on our experience and findings

10. I learned that when all is said and done it is my responsibility to master the material laid before me and learning finds its purpose, as everything else, in glorifying our Lord!

So are you encouraged?!

May God bless your week!

dana-wilson

Posted in Encouragement, Parenting/Homeschooling in General, Teaching High School | 1 Comment »

Cultural Creeping

Thursday, February 26th, 2009

I have had this fascinating youtube video someone sent me rumbling around in my mind all week. It claims to demonstrate the effects of subliminal advertising, which seems to have mixed reviews in terms of research support (although it has been banned in the US since the mid 70s). If you have six minutes to view it, I think you will find it fascinating as well. (Bear with me, this is leading somewhere.)

The idea behind subliminal advertising and this video is that we are exposed to stimuli that effect our behavior without our conscience mind even being aware that we are affected. If this principle is true, and I suspect it is, then think of the implications! Whether we choose to be or not, we are exposed to all sorts of things, not of our choosing: immodest dress, rampant materialism, and subtle and not-so-subtle pornography everywhere we go – from the magazine covers within view while standing in line at the grocery check out to television commercials we are bombarded with while sitting in our living rooms.

As believers and homeschooling parents, we know we have much higher standards than the world has. We know that we have to be careful of what we read, what we watch on television, what we view on the Internet. But as I have considered this I’ve realized that we still are affected by choices others have made–and we had better recognize that we are! If we are not actively combatting these influences, they will take their toll on us and on our families.

My pastor (Rev. Conrad ‘Buster’ Brown) made three application statements recently that seemed tailor made for this conversation I have had in my head. (I love when God does that!) First he said that we needed to actively "plead for the empowerment and leadership of the Holy Spirit." We know our quest for holiness should not be static, it should be dynamic. We are to "work out our salvation with fear and trembling." Phil. 2:12. Going beyond ‘not’ doing something, we are to earnestly seek godliness and holiness through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Secondly, Pastor Brown urged us to "understand [our] culture," giving us two quotes that hit home:

"Keep in mind while few Americans possess a biblical worldview, most are immersed in daily exercises of covert, worldview training via the mass media, public law, public school education, the internet and conversations with peers. Only an intentional process designed to develop, integrate, and apply a biblical life lense can protect us from the savage mental and spiritual assault that occurs around us every day. The failure to grasp and live out a biblical worldview can only result in a lifestyle that contradicts God’s perfect and eternal moral and spiritual code that was desgined to foster our relationship with him, each other, and the world he entrusted to us."

George Barna, Think Like Jesus

"I believe that the challenge of living with popular culture well may be as serious for modern Christians as persecution and plagues were for the saints of earlier centuries…enemies that come loudly and visibly are much easier to fight than those that are undetetectable."

Ken Myers, All God’s Children in Blue Suede Shoes

Those we and our children spend the most time with and consider our closest friends should be those with whom we have shared values. At home, dinner table conversations should include discussion of the ideas and events we come in contact with and observe in our daily lives and how those things align (or not) with what the Bible describes about how Christians are to live. Moreover, dialogue often about what it means to be ‘in the world’ but not ‘of the world.’

Thirdly, we are to meditate upon scripture. We should encourage –in ourselves and our children–regular scripture memorization. How can we incorporate this into our lives and homeschooling? One of the easiest ways we have found is to institute a scripture verse or passage to discuss, meditate upon, recite and memorize each week. Especially when children are younger, fill their minds and hearts with scripture and you will see it bear fruit when they are older!

Some significant verses to consider:

For the ear tests words as the tongue tastes food. Let us discern for ourselves what is right; let us learn together what is good. Job 34: 3-4

A simple man believes anything, but a prudent man gives thought to his steps. A wise man fears the LORD and shuns evil, but a fool is hotheaded and reckless. Prov. 14: 15-16

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. Phil. 4:8

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations. Jer. 1:5

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. James 1:19-21

God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, in order to make your hope sure. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised. Heb. 6: 10-12

The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways, but the folly of fools is deception. Prov. 14: 8

So let us remember to be aware of our surroundings and our culture, and to turn to the Holy Spirit and to the Word for help living the lives we are called to live as well as in training our children. From Phil 1: 9-11: And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.

Amen!

Dana

Posted in Encouragement, Parenting/Homeschooling in General, Personal Growth | 2 Comments »

10 Reasons Why I Homeschool

Tuesday, February 17th, 2009

Anna Hawthorne posted a great idea on her blog today– 10 reasons why she loves to homeschool. These are my 10:

They can run, but they can’t hide. Ha Ha
I love to be able to mentor and coach my kids.
Having them at home has allowed us all to be so much closer than we would have been otherwise! I love our relationships, especially at the high-school-and-above ages.
It has given us so many treasured memories over the years.
They have had educations that suited their specific needs and learning styles.
I have always been a life-long learner and have loved passing that perspective on to them.
As Christian parents we are fullfiling our command to raise godly generations.
Homeschooling has peeled away layers and layers of self-centered grunge from my soul. (Still have layers to go, it’s good I have a little longer….)
It has enabled me to be in a coaching role for newer/younger h’school moms, which has been a blessing.
Homeschooling keeps my priorities aligned as I strive to be a godly example to our kids.

How about your 10?

Posted in Encouragement, Parenting/Homeschooling in General | 2 Comments »

Should You Join a Co-op?

Tuesday, August 26th, 2008

I’ll never forget my first co-op experience. We had too many moms with two many children of different ages trying to accomplish too much. When we hit the mid-year mark and felt that we’d really given it a shot, several of us dropped out. I think it might have been a better co-op once we’d left simply because the numbers were more manageable. Numbers are just one factor related to whether co-ops succeed or not. If you’re thinking of starting a co-op or joining an existing one, answer the following questions:

How well do you know the other members and the children of the co-op? Getting involved with other families that you don’t know well for an adventure as long term as a co-op can be a risk. They may be families that you spent time with on field trips or moms that you’ve seen once a month at meetings. Neither of those situations really reveal how families handle overall discipline or organization. They don’t demonstrate their work ethic, quality of education or time management skills. Even among believing home schoolers, we are a diverse group of people focusing on various priorities and valuing different things. We may all be saved, we may all love Jesus, but that doesn’t mean we all have the same ideas about what should get accomplished, how long it should take and who should be disciplining an unruly child. All of these situations and more are addressed during co-ops so you’ll want to consider them ahead of time. If you are attracted to a particular co-op but don’t know the families well that are involved, find other ways to get to know them. Be up front and let them know that you don’t want to join and not meet the needs of the group to your best ability.
How do you and your children handle group situations? Some children don’t do well in large groups so choosing a co-op that works with your children’s comfort levels is important. Remember that co-ops can grow, so that sweet, intimate group that you started with may expand unless guidelines are established to prevent it. Also, some children don’t respond well to other adults disciplining them, even mildly. Some adults don’t like to discipline other people’s children. I personally wouldn’t be in a co-op with a mom who wasn’t comfortable with correcting my son, when necessary. I also couldn’t be in a co-op where a parent wouldn’t want me to gently correct her child, if needed. If you have a child with a learning disability, attention challenges or underdeveloped social skills, the distractions of a co-op group could prove to be frustrating all the way around. I’m not saying that such children shouldn’t be in co-ops. I am saying that finding a smaller, tightly knit group with lots of structure and grace would work best for such a child to truly benefit and to be able to contribute. My son might enjoy a large co-op but I know that he wouldn’t benefit near as much once it grows beyond 3 or 4 other kids. Knowing your own child is an important step to defining the healthiest co-op situation for both of you.
What are the goals of the co-op? Many times, collaborating with other moms sounds like so much fun and it’s just great to get the kids together once a week. However, you probably don’t want to have a co-op that doesn’t also help meet some of your educational goals. Otherwise, you’re most likely just adding another event to what may already be a very busy week. Co-ops with specific goals and objectives tend to be more successful for both the parents running it and the children participating. For example, we are currently in a co-op that features several different goals spanning a variety of subjects. However, the main goal of the co-op is to make up for the weaknesses of teaching individual high schoolers. Our co-op goals are as follows:
- Complete our Chemistry labs in a group setting (other connected goals include: working as a team and writing a successful lab report)
- Have intelligent discussion about the history books being read (other connected goals: read with a purpose, communicate what has been read, analyze reading aloud with others and apply content to projects and other activities)
- A Bible study from a male perspective (connected goals: examine the journey from boyhood to manhood with a Biblical perspective, to be in a comfortable enough setting to discuss personal male issues and to interact with godly men as role models and mentors)
- Practice speaking Spanish with someone who is fluent.

Our co-op was derived from a need to fill the gaps of our own perceived weaknesses. We are three moms with three high school boys. We knew that if we did a Bible study, it wouldn’t be the same as having godly men share this time with our boys. None of us speaks Spanish fluently, so we combined efforts to utilize a fluent college student to converse with our boys during co-op time each week. By combining efforts, we found a way to improve the quality of education for our boys, give them time to interact with other boys their age in a meaningful way and also share the burdens with one another, making them easier to bear. Not all co-ops will be developed with the same thinking. Some families do co-ops for social reasons while others really want to focus on academics. No matter what the reason, establishing firm goals from the beginning offers a greater opportunity for success.

Do you have the time and resources for a co-op? While answering this question, you need to consider that co-ops are a combination of efforts and that means that you’ll be expected to contribute time, energy and maybe even money. If you already find your schedule tight, jumping into a co-op may just result in more stress. If you’re considering joining an established co-op, be sure to inquire about your responsibilities and commitment. As well, how much will you need to work with your child at home on co-op homework, projects, etc. Finally, will you need to travel to the co-op? How much time will be eaten up on the road, prepping for the co-op and cleaning up afterward? If you are considering starting a co-op, be sure to ask all of the above questions as well as the time, energy and money needed to get the co-op off the ground and keep it running smoothly.
Will the co-op add to the quality of your child’s education? If you could just as easily meet the goals of an existing co-op by working with your children at home, it is probably not the best choice for your family. In these situations, the co-op may become cumbersome and you’ll soon be looking for reasons to leave. Don’t rush into a co-op because it sounds like fun or because you’re pining for social interaction unless those are your primary goals. While I completely understand those needs, an educational co-op may not be the place to have them met. Wait for a co-op situation or create one that will compliment your child’s educational experience, enhancing what you’re already teaching or opening a door for a new learning opportunity. If you can find a co-op that meets educational needs and offers social interaction for you and your child, that’s certainly ideal!
What will happen if you decide you can’t continue with the co-op? It’s rare for there not to be consequences when a family pulls out of a co-op. With my first experience, the only reason no one really suffered is because it was such a large co-op that I think we did everyone a favor by leaving. But in most cases, that’s not how it works. For example, if the co-op is in your home, will you feel obligated to continue or will it be possible for someone else to take over that responsibility? Maybe you have a specific role in the co-op, such as teaching science; that would be challenging for another mom to just jump in and take over. It’s really wise to have a contingency plan in mind in case you have to quit for any reason. While you don’t want to go in thinking that you’ll be leaving, having moms able to take on multiple roles and having an alternative location are both comforting for everyone involved.
Have you asked your "principal" for his opinion? Husbands and fathers can often see beyond our desires and hopes to the practical side of being home school parents. They may note when schedules are overloaded and decisions are being made emotionally. As well, if your husband supports the decision, you may be more confident in the likelihood that it’s a healthy choice for your family.
Have you prayed over the decision? Whenever we make choices that directly affect not only us but other families as well, it’s definitely essential to spend time in prayer. When we pray, we’re less likely to make a decision based on emotional responses. If you attend a meeting about the possibility of beginning or joining a co-op, it’s wisest to leave the meeting without a commitment and take time to consider God’s will in the decision. As with your husband’s support, a decision prayerfully made usually brings with it a level of confidence that’s not there when you don’t pray.

Co-ops can be beneficial and wonderful experiences. Examining your goals and reasons for creating or participating in a co-op may allow you to make a better decision. Involving your husband and God in the decision provides an even greater opportunity for success.

Watch for the upcoming second part of this series, A Picture of a Successful Co-op. May God bless you and your family!

Beth

Posted in Parenting/Homeschooling in General, Teaching High School | Comments Off

Do Not Fear!

Tuesday, August 12th, 2008

So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Isaiah 41:10

I’ve had several emails from fellow home school moms lately who are feeling extremely overwhelmed. They’re fearful about choosing the right curriculum, the right classes and creating a healthy schedule for their children. Will they have everything planned in time, will they be able to implement and follow through with the plans they’ve developed, will it all be enough or is it possibly too much, is home schooling really the answer? And the pressure seems to increase exponentially with high schoolers.Please know that I have been right there with you! This topic has come up often between God and me during my quiet time. He has laid upon my heart, one simple message…Do Not Fear!

I know…it’s so easy to say, but what can a parent really do to overcome their fear?

Give up – Not really! But it’s always an option and I thought it should be addressed. What would happen if you really did give up and just send your child back to school? Would your fear go away? Just an educated guess, but I’m betting that you’d just be replacing one set of fears with another. So, while it’s an option, it’s probably not the best one for dealing with fear.
Begin with quiet time - God is wonderful about helping me examine what it is that really concerns my heart. By leaving my fears at His feet, I realize that I’m not in this on my own. Even as a single mom, I am never alone. His wise counsel, through prayer and His Word, leads me. Sometimes, I think we separate our lives into practical and spiritual issues, then only share with God those things that seem spiritual. He created us, He loves us and He wants us to come to Him in all things, whether we’re joyful or completely overwhelmed. I find that if I go to the Lord prior to planning and writing, my head is clearer, my mind is more focused and my heart is less stressed.
Evaluate your fears and concerns – write them down and evaluate their worth. I often divide things into two categories: what I can change and what I can’t. If I can’t change it, I have to let it go, otherwise I am not honoring God or myself by letting it fester in my heart and mind. If I can change it, I brainstorm what I can do about it. Often, surprising ideas come to mind as I am making notes and I realize that a more creative solution is possible. Another positive about addressing fears is that often by writing them down, we take the steam out of them. The mind is an amazing instrument, but it can certainly work against us when we’re focused on the wrong ideas, allowing them to grow to mammoth proportions making them appear unsolvable. As a writer, I have an active imagination. It can a tremendous gift at times and a real monster creator at others! Actively evaluating your fears allows you to gain a realistic perspective.
Deal with the real fear - After evaluating your concerns, you should have a clearer picture of what’s really at the heart of your fears. For example, maybe you really can’t decide on the best math curriculum for your fifth grader. You’ve endlessly searched the web and put in a multitude of hours examining the math materials of every other family you know, but you simply can’t make a decision. What if you choose the wrong curriculum? Is your fear not even related to math, but more to the fear of being equipped as a homeschool parent? Our insecurities often result in stress over simpler matters. If you worry about your capabilities as a teacher or parent, remember that God designed your children and you specifically as a family. It wasn’t accidental or coincidence. In His ultimate plan for the world, He took the time to give you children to love and teach. He won’t let you down when you are acting according to His Will!
Grow in your fear – I know it sounds odd, but scripture is pretty clear about growing through trials. If you can view challenging and insecure times as a period of maturing, situations take on a whole new meaning. This attitude develops through practice and by laying all things at the Lord’s feet knowing that He has already worked out the solution. This isn’t a passive methodology, but an active willingness to trust in God through all things.

Home school parents are as prone to peer pressure as anyone, it seems. We easily fall into the trap of comparing our children and our homes with those of others. We’re a tight knit group and it’s easy to think that others know more than we do or make better decisions. The reality is that each of our families are unique, each of our children have different gifts and weaknesses and even our goals may be different. We have one important thing in common…we were all created by a Heavenly Father who sincerely loves us and wants to be active in the lives of our families. By seeking His wisdom before others, we can be assured that He will lead us to those who will give us godly direction.

As you begin your school year, anticipate that there will be challenges, but don’t fear them. God will hold you up and in your challenges, you can glorify Him!

Many blessings!

Beth

Posted in Encouragement, Parenting/Homeschooling in General | Comments Off

The Question Box

Monday, July 28th, 2008

I am not sure where it came from (or where it went, to be honest), but we used to have a small, shoebox-sized square box that had at one time probably held some type of food gift. It had cardboard handles at the top and large red and green paisleys running around the outside. But this was no ordinary box—this was the Question Box.

After morning devotions, our routine was to head to the schoolroom and start the academic day with the kids taking their turns pulling a question pertaining to our unit study from the box. Customarily, I would make up numbered history and science fill-in-the blank and short answer questions on the computer and print them out, making them different colors, of course. (I also made myself a key on a separate sheet of paper.) I cut them apart and into the box they went. I seem to remember coding them as well so we knew which were the ‘younger student’ questions and which were the ‘older.’ We would have a new boxful at the beginning of every unit, and for some reason, a big box full of new questions was always something they looked forward to.

Typically, at the start of a new unit they wouldn’t know many of the answers. (If they did not know the answer, the question went back into the box.) But they had fun guessing and, at the same time, became more interested in what they would be learning. As we progressed through the unit, they were jazzed about how they were getting more and more of the questions right, and how I had to throw in some harder questions just to keep things interesting. By the end of the unit they usually had all of the questions, even the hard ones, answered correctly. We also had contests and sometimes received prizes (like a piece of gum or an M&M) for answering, for example, three questions in a row correctly.

This simple idea could be adapted in a variety of ways:

· The kids could create and decorate the box

· Older students could make up questions for the younger ones

· Kids could pull a ‘seat work’ assignment out of the box, such as a verse to copy or memorize, a sentence with errors to edit, a short word problem to figure out, etc.

· An older elementary, middle or high school student could pull out a person, place or event to research, write about, and present to the group (or to you)

· Even household chores for that day could be chosen from the box.

As I have been slowly cleaning my way through the school room this summer, I came across some of our Middle Ages questions that would be appropriate for late Primary (K-2^nd), Intermediate (3^rd – 5^th) or early Preparatory (6^th-8^th) students. The last five or so would be suitable for Preparatory and/or Secondary (9^th-12^th) students. The answers are in parentheses after the questions:

1. What is the name of the part of a castle that is a tower, often round, with many stories? There, nobles slept, ate and planned. Soldiers lived on lower stories with the dungeon below. (keep)

2. Between 1100 and 1300 AD, large groups of knights, nobles and even some peasants (and children!) traveled from Europe to the Middle East to try and take possession of the Holy Lands from the Turks. These trips were called the ___________. (Crusades)

3. What are two popular games played today that originated during the Middle Ages? (chess and checkers)

4. During the Middle Ages, craft _________ were set up to make sure their members were properly trained as apprentices and produced high quality goods. (guilds)

5. From what disease in the 1300’s did about a third of all the people in Europe die? (Black Death or Bubonic Plague)

6. What was the name of a legendary king who ruled a Kingdom where people were peaceful and content? He came to represent the ideals of justice, peace and honor. (King Arthur)

7. Large, rural estates were called _________. (manors)

8. A craftsman who made tools, weapons and cooking utensils from iron was called a _______. (blacksmith)

9. Books were copied by hand, one by one, usually by ___________. (monks)

10. In manor houses, people used ___________ to cover walls, to keep out drafts, and/or to divide rooms. (carpets and tapestries)

11. What were musicians called who traveled around the country, played, sang and told stories at special feasts and other events? (minstrels)

12. ________ traveled great distances to buy and sell goods. (Traders or merchants)

13. A special design each knight carried on a shield or his clothing that helped knights tell each other apart in battle was called a _____ __ ____. (coat of arms)

14. What were pictures called that were painted directly onto wet plaster? (frescoes)

15. What was a mechanical device called that hurled heavy objects into the air, at or over castle walls during an attack? (a catapult)

16. The ________ ________ was a survey completed in 1086 of nearly all the lands in England and was conducted by officials of King William the First (also known as William the Conqueror). (Domesday Book)

17. Dried plant seeds, roots and/or leaves that were used to flavor foods or make not-so-fresh meat taste better (and were quiet expensive) were called ________. (spices)

18. The _________ was one of the most highly skilled craftsman of the middle ages, combining the jobs of architect, builder, engineer, and sculptor today, working on all stages of a building project. (mason)

19. Many ________ and _________ were used as medieval remedies for sickness and disease. (plants and herbs)

20. What was depicted by the famous Bayeux Tapestry? (The Bayeux Tapestry depicts the famous Battle of Hastings in 1066, when the Norman invader William, Duke of Normandy, challenged Saxon King Harold. William’s forces won the battle; henceforth, he was called William the Conqueror.)

21. Briefly describe the feudal system. (Vassals gave loyalty and service to lords in exchange for land and military protection)

22. Describe the concept of chivalry. (Chivalry is a group of character qualities thought to be exhibited by the perfect knight, including loyalty, honesty, courage, and courteousness—especially towards women.)

23. Describe the Magna Carta and its significance, as well as the circumstances under which it was signed. (The “Great Charter” was the first document in English history that forced a monarch to be subject to the law and provided for the creation of a strong parliament. King John, a wicked and greedy king who had levied incredibly high taxes, was forced to sign it by his rebellious barons in 1215 in Runnymede, England. Once it was signed, the barons again swore fealty to King John, not realizing the king had no intention of keeping the agreement.)

24. Name at least one key character from the Middle Ages and describe why he or she was historically significant. (This has many possible answers! Among them: Alfred the Great: a noble and wise ruler who bought about an educational revival in England; King John: [see above]; Joan of Arc: a young French girl who rallied the French against the English and who victoriously led the French army in battle. She was eventually captured and burned at the stake as a witch; Charlemagne: French ruler, Charles the Great, who controlled most of west and central Europe and presided over what was called the Carolingian Renaissance; Genghis and Kublai Khan: Grandfather and Grandson, these Mongolian leaders ruled over much of Asia and almost to Europe. Although Buddhist, they were tolerant of most religions other than Islam. Kublai did much to encourage literature and the arts.)

25. Who were the Moors? (A nomadic people from Northern Africa, the Moors descended from Arabs and Berbers who had moved into the Holy Lands and spent many years fighting the English during the Crusades. They are known for their goal to spread Islam across the world and for their magnificent, unusual architecture.)

Please feel free to use these questions in your school, and have fun making up some of your own! (And if anyone wants to send in their questions, we will post them. Many hands make light work, you know.)

Enjoy your week!

Posted in Curriculum, Lesson Plan, Parenting/Homeschooling in General, Teaching Elementary School | 1 Comment »

Choosing and Using Outside Teaching Sources Wisely

Wednesday, March 12th, 2008

As a home school mom and teacher of home schoolers, I often wonder where we draw the line when it comes to actually home schooling. It seems that some families farm out their children for most subjects and athletics as well. Then there are other families who don’t use any outside resources. I guess this brings me to a question of how we define home schooling. For each family, I would imagine that there’s a different definition to some extent. For the first family described, home schooling might be defined generally as parents having full control over their children’s academic life without the parent doing the actual teaching. For other families, the idea that home schooling requires that the parents act as teachers may seem essential. I have even known families who have home schooled using nannies. Different states have different definitions of home schooling. I believe HSLDA requires members to be responsible for teaching their children at least 51% of the time. Does that mean that only those of us who do so are really home schooling our children? I wouldn’t make that judgment call for anyone. I do think that using outside resources can be very beneficial if you are wise about your choices and feel that there are strong reasons for doing so..

There are any number of reasons that families outsource certain classes for their children, at various ages, including the following:

The parent doesn’t feel capable of teaching the course. This is definitely a solid reason for using outside courses. However, be cautious about being too desperate and make sure that the class you choose for your child also meets the needs of your family’s value system and quality of education.
The student desires to take an outside course. Often, by high school, home school students would like a little time away from home. Taking an outside course can offer an opportunity for growth, making the student responsible to another adult, which is a great learning experience. As well, outside courses often also offer a chance to socialize within a structured classroom environment.
The instructor of the course is someone with whom you’d like your child to spend time. I once put Ally in a middle school current events course just because the professor had such a Biblical, eternal worldview and he was a person for whom I have tremendous respect. She learned to examine happenings around the world from a Christian worldview and loved doing it. I think that having other teachers who demonstrate a love for the Lord or a strong faith can be worth more than the actual course content. As well, teachers who are great encouragers can work wonders for a timid child. For some children, they hear encouragement from mom and dad for so long that it doesn’t have the same impact as if it came from an outsider.
You have a large family and need help teaching your children. At times, having one or more children participating in outside courses provides the opportunity for you to work with your other children on a deeper level. This can provide a benefit to both the children taking the course and the children at home.

When selecting an outside teacher or course, you’ll want to carefully think through all of the ramifications. Weighing the pros and cons makes a great of sense in this sort of situation. Below of some of the aspects I consider when selecting courses for my children and there are probably even more that are specific to your family’s needs and desires.

Can you afford the course? It’s sad to have your student start a course and then have to pull him due to the inability to pay. It affects your child, the other children in the class, the teacher and the child that might not have been able to get into the class due to enrollment limits. Although many families go through financial crisis at some point, it’s important to ascertain ahead of time whether you can really afford the outside lessons for the duration of the course. Be sure you understand ahead of time any books or materials that may add to the expense of the course.
Is this a course in which your child can succeed? Sometimes, we are overzealous and want something for our children for which they may not be quite ready. I see this often with middle school students and parents wanting them to start high school courses in 6th and 7th grade. This can be appropriate for some students, but often it happens because the parent is worried the class won’t be offered when the child is truly ready to take it. It’s important for your child to succeed away from home. Be sure that he is ready for what the course requires.
Can you and/or your child afford the time away from home? Parents who haven’t used outside resources previously often underestimate the time it takes to travel. As well, most courses require a serious amount of homework time that will take away from family and other studies. Be sure that you have a complete understanding of what your student will be expected to accomplish outside of the classroom. Also take into account whether there are outside projects and such that require meeting with other students in addition to class time.
Is the instructor someone you want teaching your child? Outside instructors often have a tremendous impact, both positive and negative, on home school students because they are presented as immediate authority. My daughter loved every person who taught her. She had tremendous respect for her teachers and for good reason; they were awesome people who deserved her respect. But I was very particular about to whom I gave that authority. When we visited a local college, considering Ally for dual enrollment, my impression of the instructors was not very positive. I felt she wasn’t ready to be immersed in that environment even with her maturity level. Ally would’ve loved to have gone to college with those credits and she was certainly capable of the work required, but the possible impact of such instructors at an early age concerned more than receiving credits.

If you haven’t used outside teachers previously, there are some practical steps you can take when deciding who to use and what courses to select. Other parents and students can be excellent resources if you know they have the same value system as your family. When my son wanted to take drama and Spanish this year, I not only went to trusted parents who had put their children with these teachers, but I also interviewed students to see what they felt they learned if anything. Students will often be more straightforward and will point out both the positive and negative aspects. As well, they are actually in the classroom. Do be choosy about who you approach. Some people are very critical no matter how valuable the course or the teacher, and try to talk to at least 3-4 different people Of course, speak with students who are responsible and studious.

Consider interviewing the teacher ahead of time to be sure that you have the same philosophies concerning instruction and spiritual issues. I once spent three hours with an instructor on the phone and he was certain my daughter was ready for his course. In the end, although I believed him to be a godly and talented man, I felt that at the time he would certainly overwhelm my daughter who was several years younger than his average student.

Preview the curriculum used in the class. Don’t assume that a Christian teacher will use Christian curriculum. Most teachers use what they’re most comfortable teaching. I write my own curriculum and design my own courses and parents often ask me for a booklist beforehand. If you want a certain curriculum, be sure to connect with the instructor before enrolling your student.

Finally, determine what you want your child to achieve through the course and decide if it’s possible using a specific instructor and curriculum. If you don’t have a clear view going in, the waters may become muddy and you’ll end up frustrated by the end if your expectations weren’t met.

Once you have your child in an outside course, there are a few things you can do to assist your child and the teacher.

Communicate well with the instructor. Even with high school students, it’s important for the parents to understand what is going on with the course and the student. If you have concerns or family issues that pop up, communicate as quickly as possible for the best results. Most instructors are very sympathetic and will work with you and your student if they know what is happening ahead of time.
Pray for the class and the instructor. Teaching, as we all know, is a challenging calling and burn out rates are high. Prayer can make all of the difference! Letting the instructor know that you’re praying is a sweet gesture and most encouraging.
Encourage your student to do his best and assist, as necessary, particularly with organization. As students take more courses, they become more proficient at managing paperwork and such. Early on, your child may need some guidance in this area so he is organized and prepared for classes.

Utilizing outside resources can be truly beneficial for home school families. As always, prayerfully consider any such steps you might take with your children and be sure you understand both the positive and negative possibilities. As well, once you have put your child in an outside class, commit to making it best experience for everyone involved by praying and be involved.

Many blessings on your week!

Beth

Posted in Parenting/Homeschooling in General | Comments Off

What About Bad Attitudes?

Friday, March 7th, 2008

What Do You Do When Your

Child Has a Bad Attitude About Schoolwork?

What do you do when a your child has a bad attitude about doing his schoolwork, his chores, or anything else you’ve asked him to do? I confess, my initial reaction is not usually pleasant, although I am working on that. Of course, it has be the child’s problem, right? After all, I am the mature one…

Actually, over the years I have learned that the most profitable thing to do first is examine is my own attitude and expectations. Am I giving this child enough help and attention, or am I more focused on other tasks I want to accomplish during school time? Am I short-tempered or critical because I’m in a hurry or unhappy about being “interrupted, again?” Do I have too many other activities and commitments to be able to focus on my children and their education? (Ouch!) If this makes you wince, pray for yourself and your child(ren), and ask God to give you insight and wisdom into this situation. Believe me, He will do it.

Secondly, talk with your child about his attitude, and really listen to what he says. Is she hungry? Tired? Lonely? Overwhelmed? Sometimes there is a physical or psychological reason that can easily be dealt with by a snack and/or a little focused attention. If it involves more than that, at least you will convey to your child that he is more important to you than the completion of his grammar lesson.

Thirdly, determine if this is a character issue. If it is, it’s critical to identify and take steps to remedy the problem. God’s Word is very clear on the issues of anger and rebellion, and I believe the heart condition of a child is more important than his math facts. Teach scripture and train in righteousness. Have him memorize pertinent verses and hold him, your other children, and yourself, to a standard of kind and cheerful speech. Teach and reteach that “obedience” is the following: when you give an instruction, a child looks you in the eye and says “Yes, ma’am,” (I’m living in South Carolina) or “Yes, Mom,” and then immediately begins the task.

As well, this is a prudent time to get the principal involved. Whether Dad helps with academics or not, it’s critical for him to be aware, involved, and supportive of your goals and struggles with each of your students.Your children need to know they will answer to Dad for a poor attitude or negligent work. One of the systems we’ve had in place in our home during the ’younger years’ to facilitate communication is a weekly “Presentation Night.” Children have the opportunity to share what they’ve learned that week and present reports, and Dad has a chance to praise and encourage, as well as peruse any test papers and ask about any substandard work.

Lastly, use positive motivation and incentive. Try to catch your student doing something positive, such as working quietly, completing an assignment independently or quickly, speaking kindly, or having a helpful attitude with a sibling. When those occasions occur, we generally make do with a warm hug and verbal recognition, but you may want to take it to the next level. A system of tally marks or stickers per incidence with a “store” of small items, where those tallies can be redeemed at the end of the week, may work well with your child.

With realistic expectations, a calm, organized and attentive mom, consistent training and good modeling, you should be able to see improvement in your child’s attitude. And if you are anything like me, you might even grow a bit in the process.

Still learning,

Posted in Parenting/Homeschooling in General, Teaching Writing | Comments Off

Are Your Expectations Causing Frustration?

Tuesday, February 26th, 2008

Frustration is often defined as unmet expectations. A pretty practical definition, I think. For my personality, it’s definitely an accurate definition. Whether it’s my children, my colleagues, my family or myself, I get very frustrated when I expect something to work out and it doesn’t. My children will never forget the multitude of plans and schedules that I have produced believing that those tools will be the answers to elminating my frustration. Well, it has taken me more years than I care to admit to come to the realization that my expectations cause more frustration than anything or anyone else.

When Ally was in high school, around the end of her sophomore year, she developed this habit of writing down quotations that inspired her onto notecards and sticking the notecards on memo boards all around her bedroom. I would occasionally tour her room (when I could wade throught the piles of clothing and books) and read her current finds. Most often she gave credit for the quotations on the card and many incredible names appeared over the years, from great authors to theologians, to missionaries. One day I noticed a quotation without any name credited. It read something like "The goal is not perfection, but it’s the striving that counts." I don’t even remember it verbatim, but at the time, I thought it held some wisdom. Ally wasn’t home at that moment, but I carried those words with me for a week or so, thinking about my own challenges as an overachiever. I had always been an overachiever, even as a young child. My goal was to please my parents and "A"s did it most of the time. My mother also loved to see me receive awards and appear in the newspaper, although she never really had to push me. I was born striving to please, I believe. Nevertheless, a week or so after seeing the quotation, I asked Ally one day where she had found it, and to my total astonishment, she responded with a chuckle, "Mom, you said that to me."

Major epiphany moment there! I don’t know which surprised me more, that those words came out of my mouth or that Ally heard them! I am still often surprised at the importance that my children place on my words (now, that’s another whole blog topic in itself). I do have a great deal of respect for my daughter. I believe God has instilled wisdom and a heart in her beyond her years. After some thought, I decided that if Ally valued those words, I should at least try to live by them. It’s a tremendous struggle for me because I have "to the moon, out of this world" expectations of myself. My son, John Paul, continually points out that my to do list is an impossibility and it would make a normal human being give up before starting. He is probably right, but I have come to some compromises over the years that I would like to share with you, just in case your unmet expectations are causing you frustration.

1. I do keep a major to do list but I have learned to view it as things I’d like to see done rather than things that have to be done in a day. I derive a great deal of pleasure from crossing things off of lists. I like that sense of accomplishment. However, now I can finish the day without finishing the list. God is gracious…He will either give me tomorrow to work on it or He will remove me from this earth and I won’t have to worry about to do lists anymore. It’s a win-win situation.

2. Some days, I make a "got done" list rather than a to do list. I simply write down everything I do in a day from quiet time to laundry to school to teaching courses to writing articles to designing curriculum to answering email to making dinner to working out to… Let me tell you, that got done list can be a joyous thing. You will sleep better at night after reading it because some days feel like nothing was accomplished and yet, that never seems to be the case.

3. I listen to those I love. When my son says things like "I just can’t be perfect", it’s a signal. He doesn’t know it, but it represents to me a time when I am clearly causing him serious frustration and my expectations should be examined. They are most likely too high. Learning to evaluate my own expectations in any given situation has allowed me great freedom…it’s allowed me to admit that I am heading in the wrong direction and need to make a change. It’s also been a celebration as I see it happening less and less.

4. I don’t compare myself to others. I have been in some situations over the last few years where other people have compared me to themselves in work ethic, priorities, etc. For some time, it really weighed me down and caused me to feel that I was just not up to par. Don’t let anyone do that to you. God created each of us uniquely and if you are listening to Him, you will know where your priorities should lie and what you should be accomplishing in this life. I spent many years of my life trying to meet other’s expectations of what they believed me to be. I am not blaming anyone else because I let it happen, but even after many years, I have finally learned from it. God has expectations of you. Time with Him will reveal those expectations and they are the only ones with which you need to be concerned.

5. I don’t panic when it doesn’t seem to work. I could give you lists of events, deadlines, etc. that caused me to work late into the night, to neglect my family and to harm my own health because I went into panic mode. It was only later that I would see my over-reaction and the detriment of it to myself and others I love. It’s not worth it. All things happen in God’s time…as humans, we have such a limited sense of time. We are foolish when we try to take control of it.

Jesus was on the tightest schedule known to man with the greatest job ever. His to do list included his own persecution and painful death. These two facts help me start each day with the hope that my concerns and worries are in God’s hands, that my goals are in line with His will and that at the end of the day, He will be pleased with me. I pray that for each of you. God bless!

Beth

Posted in Encouragement, Parenting/Homeschooling in General | 1 Comment »

Archive for the ‘Parenting/Homeschooling in General’ Category

A Homeschool Graduate Looks Back

Cultural Creeping

10 Reasons Why I Homeschool

Should You Join a Co-op?

Do Not Fear!

The Question Box

Choosing and Using Outside Teaching Sources Wisely

What About Bad Attitudes?

Are Your Expectations Causing Frustration?

WOULD YOU EPI KARDIA USERS GIVE US JUST A MOMENT?

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